Seventh Year Senior Syndrome

Never one to let go of my psychology roots, I recently diagnosed myself with a very serious disorder: Seventh Year Senior Syndrome (SYSS). Though the incident rate of SYSS is high amongst my fellow law school classmates, SYSS is a rather rare syndrome. At it's earliest stage, fifth-year senior syndrome, it affects those few (or slacker) college students who choose to stretch out their undegraduate to a fifth year. However, if further schooling must be pursued, there is a 99.9% chance the syndrome will develop into full-blown SYSS.

SYSS manifests itself in many different ways. Its effects are most prominent whenever an SYSS sufferer must enter the law school, talk about law school, or attempt to find a legal job. Most SYSS sufferers cope with its effects by limiting appearances at law school to as few as possible(note this does not mean class-skipping), frequent outbursts damning the law school to a fiery place, frequent party-planning/attending, day drinking at the crossing and late-night partying with other SYSS sufferers. SYSS sufferers do not limit their coping mechanisms to alcohol, however. In fact, being the perfectionists that most SYSS sufferers are, many turn to exercise. Yoga classes are over-crowded with eager SYSS sufferers who are ready to sweat out the law school toxins in their bodies. Sunny days in Lawrence equals crowds of SYSS sufferers walking/running around downtown, soaking up the sun in order to burn away more toxins. Nonetheless, many of these activities may soon turn ugly. After any given yoga class, you may find an SYSS sufferer peer-pressuring others to blow off their school responsibilities and go to dinner on Mass street...followed by a few beers at a random bar... 'til passouts do you part.

The treatment, ofcourse, is relatively simple: stop going to school. Thankfully, my treatment is on it's way. By May 20 of this year, they say I'll virtually be cured of my SYSS. And it really couldn't come at a more fortunate time.